Reflection and Intention: The Best of 2009, Creating 2010

I highly recommend using this review and planning tool, created in part by Paul Schadler, MD.  This is the ninth year I’ve used it, and it helps me keep my focus on all that is most meaningful to me.  Give yourself several hours over two or three days to work with it.  Give yourself the gift of being very present, without rushing through it.

The Best of 2009

Go wild!  Acknowledge all your goodness and greatness.
One guideline: no criticism, only positives.

  • What did I accomplish that I am most proud of?
  • What experiences touched me the most? Were the most intimate?
  • When did I have the most fun?
  • What experiences were the most powerful?
  • Most sacred?
  • What difficult challenges did I meet successfully?
  • In meeting the challenges, what did I do best?
  • What lessons did I learn?
  • Describe my power in those situations.

Creating 2010

Think big!  Be bold!  Have fun!

  • What dominant intention do I have for 2010?
  • For my mind/body/spirit?
  • My relationships?
  • My home environment?
  • My work/service?
  • My finances?
  • My growth/development?
  • My fun, adventure, expression?
  • In which areas of my life do I plan to move forward in 2010?
  • What challenges do I intend to overcome?
  • What specific goals do I intend to achieve in 2010?
  • Who do I want to be?  What do I choose to live/express more?

Spiritual Awareness: The Light That Is You

Yesterday, to celebrate the Winter Solstice, I spent time in City Park hanging out near one of my favorite trees and watching (what seemed like) ten thousand geese.  A couple of years ago, I “heard” that this particular tree’s name is Grace. which suits her so beautifully.  She embodies natural, elegant grace.

As I pondered the gifts of the Solstice, I realized how completely and effortlessly Grace is Grace, the Light that is Grace.  As is each of those geese the Light that is each of them.  Goose number one: the Light that is Goose number one. Goose number two: the Light that is Goose number two. (I haven’t learned each of their names, yet!)

Without any strain, second-guessing or stress, every tree and every goose in the park is naturally and fully the Light that they are.

So, today, this day after the darkest day in the northern hemisphere, I offer you my deepest wish of this sacred season, given to me by the trees and the geese.

May you pause for a moment now to recognize and fully take in the completely unique Light that you are, a blessing to the world.  No need to do anything, no need to be different than you are, no strain, no second-guessing, no stress.  Simply breathing into the Light that is you.

“I wish I could show you, when you are lonely or in darkness, the astonishing Light of your own Being.”
-  Hafiz

Clear intention: Quantum Leap to the Person You’d Like to Be, part II of II

Last week, we looked at making decisions as if we already are that incredibly successful and fulfilled version of ourselves.  What choices does she make in a day?  How does he think about himself?  What daily practices allow her light to shine more fully?

Here is a delightful role model story for us – about Bobby Fisher, World Chess Champion.  I first read a bit about his story in Steve Chandler’s transformative ebook, “How to Get Clients.” 

Fischer became the World Chess Champion in 1972 when he beat Boris Spassky.  While Fischer and Spassky had similar skill sets, Fischer also prepared for the chess match by swimming laps under water.

Spassky, an overweight smoker, viewed chess exclusively as a mental game.  Why focus on taking care of your body, when you use only your brain for chess? Because of his swimming, during the chess match, Fischer had more oxygen going to his brain than Spassky.

The more we understand the body/mind/spirit connection as Bobby Fischer did, the more we succeed in all areas of our lives.  Tending our body, mind and spirit gives us more energy and increases our availability to give.  We are more creative, positive and clear thinking.  We listen better, solve problems with more ease and grace, react more slowly and respond more fully and thoughtfully.

In my fourteenth month of practicing Kundalini yoga, I still feel a bit stunned by (and deeply grateful for) how much this weekly practice has strengthened me physically, clarified me emotionally, sharpened me mentally and softened me spiritually. And, I’ve lost 13 pounds!

As I quantum leap to a whole new level of supporting my clients as their right-hand business partner and spiritual business/life advisor, as well as their transformational coach, I am thrilled to make choices that call forth the best of me – body, mind and spirit!

What about you?  What, who, are you being called to?  What new choices can you make to support this New You?

 

Clear intention: Quantum Leap to the Person You’d Like to Be, part I of II

Would you like to be a more successful business person?  A thinner version of yourself?  A more loving person?  A more patient person?  Widely recognized as a talented artist?  Then, let’s play a game: be that person now.

First, define this person.  For example: My Natural Rockefeller, Me with a Rockin’ Hot Body, Love Goddess, etc.  Have fun with it.  Pick a name that makes you grin, giggle and stand a bit taller.  Now the fun really begins.  Play with making every choice, taking every breath as that person.  What does your Natural Rockefeller eat for breakfast?  What music does she listen to?  How does she speak?  Who are her friends?  How does she treat herself, talk to herself?

Give yourself permission to play this game fully.  Become aware of all the choices you make in a day.  In every moment, choose as this new version of yourself.  And, get ready for lots of fun, plenty of laughs and maybe a miracle or two!

Conscious Choice: Today is “Just Be Kind” day

Cindy Kirchhoff has declared today “Just Be Kind” day and she tied it into Cami Walker’s “29 Gifts in 29 Days” challenge.

If you’d like an uplifting focus and a positive mental attitude for today and the next 28 days, I highly recommend taking 6 or 8 minutes now to get started . . .
 
Here is my gift and contribution to Kindness today:
 
Path of Love
 
May I breathe into being fully present,
offering myself unconditional
attention, acceptance, appreciation,
affection and allowing.
 
May I gently release
judgment, fear, control and demands.
 
May I offer my love to everyone this way.
 
May I increasingly allow and receive
all the love that comes to me.
 
May I feel compassion
for those who are afraid to love,
even if they are lashing out.
 
May all beings find and choose
this path of love.

Affirmative Prayer: Imagine a World Powered by Gratitude

What if, just for today,
I feel grateful for everything in my life?

I’d start with the obvious:
My health, my home, my friends, my family.
My wonderful work, my bills all paid.

I’d move on to everyday joys:
My cat chasing a wad of paper,
The crisp, cool autumn air,
This delightful cup of tea,
The way the sun streams into my office,
My comfortable chair,
And my fabulous stereo.

I’d contemplate all the gifts I feel honored to offer the world:
My love, my enthusiasm, my centeredness,
My clear thinking and my insightfulness.

I’d revel in the gifts I receive from others today:
Their love, their generosity, their kindness,
Their encouragement and their patience.

I’d thank God for the gift in what I consider “challenges:”
A misunderstanding and disagreement with a friend,
A seemingly missed opportunity,
What looks like self-sabatoge,
Yet another headache or heartache.

I’d thank God for showing the face of God
All around me and from within me.

If I thought of anything for which I didn’t know
how to feel thankful, I’d feel gratitude
for the opportunity to see from a bigger perspective.

Until I could.

And then,
I’d feel profound gratitude for this incredible privilege
to be here now, alive on this planet,
contributing what I came here to give.

And then,
I’d do it again tomorrow.

 

What are you grateful for today?

Happy Thanksgiving!

Spiritual Clarity: Changing the Channel

On a recent teleseminar with Sonia Choquette about her new book, “The Answer is Simple . . . Love Yourself, Live Your Spirit,” I heard her say several times, “change the channel.”  Referring to more consistently choosing to live our spirits rather than our egos, she reminded us how to know the difference.

When we live from our ego, we need to control, be right and defend.  We choose from fear; feeling contracted, small and ineffective. 

When we live from our spirit, we’re loving, patient, intuitive, creative, open and courageous.  We feel expansive, confident and effective.

So, when we notice we’d like to change the channel to spirit, how do we do it?  The quickest way: do something we love, with bonus points if we’re moving our bodies and/or getting outside!

I keep a Top 12 list of things to remember to do each day to keep me feeling great, keep me living from spirit.  I have all my clients do the same.  Each person’s is unique.  Mine includes snow shoveling this time of year – I love snow and I get to move my body and play outside.  Many people do not like to shovel snow, but some love to hike or take their dog to the dog park, two things I don’t like and don’t do!

What’s on your Top 12 for Spirit list?  Write your list, post it where you’ll see it and you’ve created an easy way to change the channel any time you’d like!

Marketing Coaching: Elevator Speech Worth Riding More Elevators!

I’m 49 years old, have been self-employed my whole life and have avoided the “what do you do” question like the H1N1 virus!  Until last week, if I found myself in a situation where I had to answer the question, I’d reply, “I’m a business coach” and change the subject.

The irony: since the early 90s, I’ve taught other self-employed folks how to talk about their work from a client-centered perspective, rather than talk about their credentials or job title.  

And, I let myself off the hook.  I rationalized that it took too many words to really describe the value of business coaching, much less the spiritual variety I offer. (I had other similar rationalizations for my previous businesses.  You would think I might have noticed the pattern!)  

I rationalized that I didn’t meet my clients at networking events.  My clients tend to hire me after they read something I’ve written or heard me speak at a meeting or conference.  So, they knew about me – I didn’t need an “elevator speech.”  Has anyone ever actually met a client on an elevator?!?

Well, last week, I decided once and for all that I wanted an elevator speech anyway.  Because I wanted to be in integrity with this.  Because it would help me understand exactly the value of what I offer.  Because my own business coach and mentor challenged me!

Of course, in that powerful decision moment, all the stars aligned and it tumbled out of me.  

“I teach business owners clarity and confidence about themselves and their businesses so they’re happier and more successful.”

I feel so excited to tell you what I do!  Since I wrote that, I’ve asked several people to ask me what I do, just so I can say it and refine it!

What allowed it to tumble out of me now, after it had eluded me all these years?

First, I used a new verb.  In the past, I’ve used the verb “help” instead of “teach.”  I’ve been owning the teaching aspect of me more since I took the Strong Life test.

No surprise, the test indicated my strongest life role is Teacher.  I love to teach.  I get excited about teaching.  Another role in the assessment is Caretaker, which reminds me of “helping.”  I don’t like the idea of Caretaker.  I don’t feel strengthened by the thought of helping like I do by the thought of teaching.  This may seem like a small distinction, but it’s been huge for me.  On a scale of 1 to 10, I am excited about teaching at the level of 9.  Helping feels like a 4 to me!  No wonder I wanted to avoid the conversation . . .

Secondly, over and over and over again, my clients tell me that our work together gives them clarity and confidence.  That’s important to them.  They love to keep working together because they value on-going clarity and confidence.  Yet, that never seemed like the bottom line to me.  Usually, my clients want to get more clients and make more money.  A former stab at an elevator speech for me might have sounded like, “I help business owners get more clients and make more money.”  Yuck!  That’s a 3 for me on a scale of 1 to 10.

It’s a true statement.  Yet, so cliché.  And, it doesn’t say how (via clarity and confidence).  And, many other coaches promise the same.  How does a potential client discern?

Third, “ . . . clarity and confidence about themselves and their businesses . . . ”  People often come to me thinking the business is the issue.  They aren’t usually aware that all business problems are people problems.  As my clients gain clarity and confidence about themselves, the business issues are naturally addressed as well.  So, my new elevator speech addresses where they think the problem is (the business) and where I know the solution is (the business owner).

And finally, as I have worked with so many clients, I’ve noticed they want to be happy and successful.  They don’t actually want to just make more money.  They want to make it in a way that feels good, fun and meaningful to them!

Now it’s your turn.  How can you use my clues to create or tweek your elevator speech until you cannot wait to ride more elevators?

Post yours in the comments section here.  I’d love to share lots of examples on a Thriving Coaches roundtable.

Self Improvement: Getting Beyond Habitual Conditioning

Consciously choosing is one of my core values.  So is loving kindness.  Yet, in some situations, I’d like to respond to someone with loving kindness and I instead hear myself defending my ego or reacting from programmed conditioning.  In these moments, I realize how automatically and ready are my ego and my conditioning.

To go beyond these ingrained habits, I use one or all of my “Choosing” tools:

  • As often as I remember, I affirm, “not my will, rather Thy will.”  This reminds me to choose from God/good consciousness.
  • In tough situations, before I speak, I take a breath.  This gives me a moment to actually choose a response rather than habitually and automatically reacting.
  • If I do react, I apologize and ask for a re-do.  This allows me to consciously respond even after I’ve reacted.
  • I actively listen for inspiration and guidance.  And, I follow it, even if I don’t fully and logically understand it.  This accesses the inspired path, rather than the habitual one, because I already know where it leads!
  • I remind myself to allow grace and miracles.  This chooses for me far greater outcomes than I ever could have imagined.

If we don’t consciously use choosing tools, we react as we’ve always reacted and get what we’ve always gotten!  Feel free to use my tools liberally and I would love to learn and try your tools, too . . .

Clear Intention: Change Your Life with “What” and “How”

Imagine the difference in the quality of your life in this same scenario, played out two different ways.  First, the way we tend to to do and second with a clear intention for the outcome we desire.  You’ve had a powerful initial conversation with a potential client and she told you she’ll get back to you by Tuesday to get started.  Tuesday comes and goes and you don’t hear from her.

The “Why” life:
“Why hasn’t she called?”  “Why didn’t I set a specific time with her?”  “Why didn’t I tell her about ________ (you fill in the blank)?” 

The “Why” life leads to making things up, taking things personally, making assumptions, second-guessing ourselves and a whole lotta needless misery.

The “What and How” life:
“Okay, she hasn’t called.  What would I like?  I’d like to get started working with her if that’s what she still would like to do.  Okay, how would I like to proceed?  It feels good to me to give her a couple of days and if I don’t hear from her by Friday, I will call her to check in and let her know I’d like to get started working with her if that’s what she still would like to do.”

The “What and How” life empowers you in knowing what you’d like and in taking action toward bringing that about!  No making things up, taking things personally, making assumptions, second-guessing or needless misery.

Would you like to play with it for a week and see how it shifts your life?  I’d love to hear your experience if you decide to play . . .